In basic communications you have:
* Sender
* Receiver
* Message
*Channel (i.e., memo, voice, e-mail, etc,)
* Feedback (from receiver)
* Field of Experience
* Noise (internal & external)
We all understand what basic communications is; we communicate a message to someone and the words in that message are received but is the meaning and intent of those words understood? What did you intend for the receiver to hear and understand? What thoughts and ideas are you trying to convey? What are your feelings about what you are communicating?
Feelings are a big part in effective communications.
* Share what you're feeling?
* First "Truth" First.
-identify feelings for yourself !!
- share with the listener !!
- avoid listener making-up a "story" !!
To be clear in what you are feeling in your communications; to ensure that the meaning and intent of your communications is clear, I use what I call the "Communications Formula"
The Communications Formula:
*Here is what I see (or hear)......
*Here is how I interpret it ......
* Here is how I feel about it ......
*This is what I would have preferred ......
* This is what I want now ......
An example of how this would sound is:
Say that your boss is always running around you and giving work instructions to the people who report to you and you communicate to your boss your dislike for his or her behavior; you would say:
* What I see is that you are always going around me and giving work instructions to the people
who report to me.
* I interpret your actions and behavior as disrespect of my supervisory abilities.
* When you do that I feel disrespected and undermined.
* What I would have preferred is that you come to me with the work instructions and I will give
them to the people who report to me.
* In the future what I want is for you to come to me and I will give the work instructions to the
people who report to me.
Now your boss may not agree but he or she is clear about the meaning and intent of your communications and know how you feel about what you communicated.
The Ten Commandments of Good Communications
* Clarify your ideas
* Determine an approach
* Consider the physical setting
* Consult with others
* Consider verbal and non-verbal message impact
* Be a good listener
* Make necessary adjustments
* Provide appropriate feedback
* Follow-up
Communications Paradox:
" I know that you believe that you understand what you think that I said, but I am not sure you
realize that what you heard is not what I meant !!"
Another part of effective communications is "non-verbal communications; sometimes words lie but body language always tells the truth.
Non-Verbal Communications:
* Sign language
*Space (most people do not want other people to enter their space; how close will you let others
get to you?)
* Time, and of course,
*Body Language
-Tone of voice
- Posture
- Gestures
- Silence
-Facial expressions
_ Eye contact
I believe that the most important aspect of effective communications is effective listening; while there are many courses on effective communications there are virtually few on effective listening.
Why we don't listen:
* Speech- 125 to 140 words per/minute
* Ear (hearing) - 400 words or more per/minute
* Brain - processes 1000 to 1400 words per/minute
* Attention span - " 17 seconds"
* Communications breakdown
1. writing 9%
2. reading 16%
3. speaking 30%
4. listening 45%
These are just some of my ideas on effective communications.
One last thought, you often hear people say, I didn't mean that; if you said it you meant it, maybe you mean that you wish that you had not said it??
Howard W. Lewis
Labor Relations Consultant
* Sender
* Receiver
* Message
*Channel (i.e., memo, voice, e-mail, etc,)
* Feedback (from receiver)
* Field of Experience
* Noise (internal & external)
We all understand what basic communications is; we communicate a message to someone and the words in that message are received but is the meaning and intent of those words understood? What did you intend for the receiver to hear and understand? What thoughts and ideas are you trying to convey? What are your feelings about what you are communicating?
Feelings are a big part in effective communications.
* Share what you're feeling?
* First "Truth" First.
-identify feelings for yourself !!
- share with the listener !!
- avoid listener making-up a "story" !!
To be clear in what you are feeling in your communications; to ensure that the meaning and intent of your communications is clear, I use what I call the "Communications Formula"
The Communications Formula:
*Here is what I see (or hear)......
*Here is how I interpret it ......
* Here is how I feel about it ......
*This is what I would have preferred ......
* This is what I want now ......
An example of how this would sound is:
Say that your boss is always running around you and giving work instructions to the people who report to you and you communicate to your boss your dislike for his or her behavior; you would say:
* What I see is that you are always going around me and giving work instructions to the people
who report to me.
* I interpret your actions and behavior as disrespect of my supervisory abilities.
* When you do that I feel disrespected and undermined.
* What I would have preferred is that you come to me with the work instructions and I will give
them to the people who report to me.
* In the future what I want is for you to come to me and I will give the work instructions to the
people who report to me.
Now your boss may not agree but he or she is clear about the meaning and intent of your communications and know how you feel about what you communicated.
The Ten Commandments of Good Communications
* Clarify your ideas
* Determine an approach
* Consider the physical setting
* Consult with others
* Consider verbal and non-verbal message impact
* Be a good listener
* Make necessary adjustments
* Provide appropriate feedback
* Follow-up
Communications Paradox:
" I know that you believe that you understand what you think that I said, but I am not sure you
realize that what you heard is not what I meant !!"
Another part of effective communications is "non-verbal communications; sometimes words lie but body language always tells the truth.
Non-Verbal Communications:
* Sign language
*Space (most people do not want other people to enter their space; how close will you let others
get to you?)
* Time, and of course,
*Body Language
-Tone of voice
- Posture
- Gestures
- Silence
-Facial expressions
_ Eye contact
I believe that the most important aspect of effective communications is effective listening; while there are many courses on effective communications there are virtually few on effective listening.
Why we don't listen:
* Speech- 125 to 140 words per/minute
* Ear (hearing) - 400 words or more per/minute
* Brain - processes 1000 to 1400 words per/minute
* Attention span - " 17 seconds"
* Communications breakdown
1. writing 9%
2. reading 16%
3. speaking 30%
4. listening 45%
These are just some of my ideas on effective communications.
One last thought, you often hear people say, I didn't mean that; if you said it you meant it, maybe you mean that you wish that you had not said it??
Howard W. Lewis
Labor Relations Consultant
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